Think Of Doing House Chores As Repaying Your Debt

An extract from Venerable Pomnyun’s book, Life Lessons

P: As we get older, we look back on our past, and during the remainder of our lives, we try to achieve the goals we had set for ourselves. At such a point in time, we are likely to get greedy to reach our goals quickly because we feel that we don’t have much time left. However, if we get greedy and attempt to do too much, that can actually be detrimental to our lives.

Q: “Looking back, I regret not having contributed more to my community. So, I would like to lead a more meaningful life during the years that I have left, but things are not turning out the way I would like them to.”

P: The person who said this may appear to be reflecting on his life, but in reality, he is simply feeling a lot of regrets. This stems from greed. Because of his thought, “I must lead a meaningful life,” he is unsatisfied with the life that he has led so far. He must first let go of his greed. When people have regrets about their lives in the later years, they are likely to worry about their hair turning white, getting wrinkles, losing their eyesight, losing their hearing, not being able to walk quickly, and so on. If we cannot accept the reality as it is, we may end up feeling insignificant. The point is that we must let go of greed. Then, it will be fine whatever we do, as long as it is not excessive.

When you can acknowledge to yourself, “I have lived long enough,” you may be able to let go of your greed. When you pass the age of sixty, you should stop thinking that you should do this or that because from that point on, life is a bonus. Once we are happy doing whatever we are called upon to do without insisting on pursuing a personal goal, we will no longer be greedy, and that will enable us to do the things that are needed in our society. When your son needs help, you can help him, and when your friends need help, you can help them. That is a life of letting go. You may think that making a plan and pursuing it is a good thing, but actually, you are being greedy. Thinking that since you have lived long enough and worked hard enough, you won’t do anything from now on is also being greedy because you have set doing nothing and relaxing as your goals.

As you pass the age of 65, when you gain the status of a senior citizen, you need to make a transition into a life of giving back. Rather than seeking to receive a payment for your work, you should volunteer your time and talents for your community and give back all you have received until now. If you have money, you can donate money. If you don’t have money, you can volunteer whatever talents you may have. For instance, if you are a good speaker, you can volunteer that ability, and if you are physically strong, you can volunteer to do things that require physical strength. If you have a lot of time on your hands, you can donate your time. As you are doing volunteer work, you must refrain from setting a goal because wanting to achieve that goal will make you greedy and put undue stress on your mind and body.

Also, you don’t necessarily have to spend all your time doing volunteer work outside the home. If a man has received a lot of assistance and support from his wife during his life, he may do things for her in repayment. How happy would the wife be to find breakfast set on the table when she wakes up in the morning? Let’s say a man who has been self-centered and obstinate all his life starts doing some house chores considering it as a repayment of debt to his wife. He will find that it is possible to live with his wife like newlyweds in his 60’s and have a happy marriage even in his 70s.